Wash it all away...

There is something about a spring rain.
Something that wells up inside of me and makes me feel more alive.
Winter is always so long and trying.
It weighs heavy on me.
Spring comes and there is new and beautiful life everywhere.
It's refreshing.
It's inspiring.
Yet winter still weighs heavy...
Until it pours.
It washes away all of the sadness.
The despair.
The darkness.
It cleanses from the inside out.

It is pouring outside.
It is refreshing.
It has brought with it a calm.
A much needed calm I might add...
She has been teething!
We are worn out.
We needed a refresh.

Being a parent, I learn more and more about God's love for us each day.
If I would gladly take my Sweet Afton's pain and bear it for her...
How much more He for us.
I hate to see her in pain.
She doesn't understand it either.
She doesn't know why she is hurting.
How familiar.
I know that it is because she has tiny little teeth pushing through.
How often are we hurting and don't understand why?
He knows why and He desires to take us through it.

I have more mommying to do now...
I love to sit and watch her play.
I just adore her.
Everything she does is precious.
Then, just when I've had my fill of Afton watching...
She looks up and flashes me a devious smile.
What a reward...

Oh the places you'll go...

I wish that Afton could remember all of the adventures that we have taken her on.

We took a vacation!
It was quite spectacular to get out and have absolutely nothing to do.

 

No phone calls to answer, no e-mails to check, no fires to put out.

We started in Eureka Springs. The views were quite amazing.

We checked out the glass chapel. As I'm writing this I have totally forgotten it's actual name. :-/

On the way out of Eureka and on to Branson we stopped in at Cosmic Cavern.

It had 2 bottomless lakes that were quite pretty.

It also had many, many steep and wet stairs.

Todd wore Afton to insure maximum safety. ;-)

When we got to our 'hotel' we were happily surprised to find that we were actually staying in a condo out in the middle of nowhere. It was so very quiet.

We could hear the crickets and frogs in the evenings, something we haven't heard since we sold our house in the country.

We went to the Dixie Stampede the evening we got to Branson. 

We didn't take any pictures. :-(

It was very entertaining.

However, it was late in the evening and so we were pretty busy keeping Afton happy.

The first full day we were in Branson we went to Silver Dollar City.

Once again, we didn't take any pictures. :-(

Have you ever been to Marvel Cave in Silver Dollar City?

A-MA-ZING!

It was sooo cool, not to mention free.

When you have a baby you don't get to ride many rides. 

So we walked around and shopped and enjoyed the beautiful weather. 

That was all we did that day. It was exhausting.

Afton LOVES driving!

Driving a Duck!

Well worth the money.

Fun for the whole family.

We also went to the Titanic Museum and Downtown for shopping and food. 

Bradford B&B

Relaxing for the whole family. 

Lunch with friends on the way out.

Etc., Etc.

We crossed this bridge on the way home and at the end of it there was a sign that read, "You are now entering Nostalgia."

Quite fitting for the end of our journey.

nostalgia |näˈstaljə, nə-|nouna sentimental longing or wistful affection for the past, typically for a period or place with happy personal associations

A day at the park!

The weather was so beautiful today!
Late this afternoon we went to the park and had a picnic!

Afton loved being outside and Todd and I really enjoyed the quiet time with each other.

Baby Beauty

When did my sweet girl get so big?

Having a baby really shows you how relative time is.

Just as soon as I wrap my brain around her being 6 months old she goes and turns 7 months.

What am I going to do?

We are so in love with her.

I have been really busy with being a mommy lately and blogging is not on the top of my to-do list so I will start posting at least a picture with a few sentences AT LEAST every couple of days. :-)

go baby go

No one told me just how challenging a 6, almost 7, month old little girl can be.
She desperately wants to crawl, but she just doesn't quite have the strength.
So she rolls until she gets stuck on a piece of furniture and then screams until I move her.
Fun. :-)
She has recently decided that she loathes playing on the floor with her many toys. I think it just reminds her of the fact that she can not yet crawl and it makes her very angry.
What does she want to do with all of her spare time?
Ride on my hip.
I did not say sit on my lap. That would be too easy.
She wants to GO and I am her chauffeur.
She also wants to touch, grab, hold, eat everything that is not appropriate for her to touch, grab, hold, eat.
Scissors, pens, forks, cords, pictures, anything breakable, and anything small enough to choke on.
Replacing her desired object with anything age appropriate results in a very unladylike grunting session or crying.
I must say that this extremely high maintenance phase makes her happy and content moments SO much more enjoyable and quite precious.
She LOVES her high chair. Maybe it's the grown up food association, or maybe it's the view. I don't know nor do I really care.
When all else fails, I strap her in and give her some food to throw on the floor.

She is extremely happy to go on any venture involving riding in her stroller.
Even Atwoods with daddy to get plumbing parts.
She is all about going.
Part of me wants her to learn to crawl so that she will be happier, and then the other part knows that once she can crawl she will be GOING all over the house and into everything that is not age appropriate.
I also fear that reaching this next milestone will bring with it the need to practice in the middle of the night, bringing on another month of sleepless nights for mommy and daddy.
Each new phase of wonderful brings it's bitter side right along with it.
I'm glad that the wonderful outweighs the bitter by tons and tons.
It makes the challenge of mothering such a head strong child quite enjoyable.
I almost forgot to mention that there are only two people that can hold my sweet girl without me in the room without her searching and sadly whimpering for me.
I absolutely love this.

I love being the one she wants.

Making the effort

Is it completely strange that our Valentine's plans consist of a simple steak dinner at home?
Maybe throw in a few candles?
I've always completely adored getting flowers and chocolates on Valentine's Day.
I've always loved giving a well thought out love letter to my wonderful husband.
I've always ended it at that. :-)
I don't decorate my house with red and pink hearts.
I don't spend any time on lovey crafts either.
The only reason I am planning on having a steak dinner by potential candlelight?
Because we desperately need the effort.
We're not really disconnected but let's face it, life with Afton is not the same as life without her.
We need to make the effort of wooing each other over a romantic candlelight dinner... with Afton. :-)

Yes, our 6 month old daughter will be joining us during our romantic Valentine's dinner.
Will it be a different kind of romantic?
I imagine so.
Does that make it any less important or meaningful?
I think not.
I was pleasantly surprised tonight when Todd arrived home with pretty red Tulips.
Simple?
Yes.
Perfectly wonderful?
Absolutely.

This is our new romance. :-)
I knew it would change someday and I know that it will continue to change.
It takes adjusting. It takes practice. It takes being deliberate. It takes grace.
It takes the two of us making an effort.
Our Valentine's theme this year is not love or lust or infatuation.
Our theme is effort.
That is our Valentine's theme this year.

Happy Birthday!

Tuesday marked my 6 month anniversary of being a mother.
It was also the day that Afton turned 6 months old.
What a coincidence. :-)
As I sit here and listen to her trying to sing herself awake with her foot in her mouth, I can't help but smile.
What a joyful journey this has been.

Have their been days that I wanted to crawl under a rock and disappear?
Yes.
Have their been days where I could not wait for her next nap?
Absolutely.
Even in the midst of those difficult and tiring days she brought so many smiles to my face.

Some days she wears me completely out.
It's 5 o'clock. Todd is on his way home.
I still haven't had a shower and the only food in my stomach is a cookie or a slice of cheese.
She is supposed to be going down for a nap.
Instead, she is singing to her foot.
Before I have a chance to hop in and out of the shower she grows tired of singing to her foot and starts screaming her head off.
She does not want to nap.
What a surprise.
I am unbelievably frustrated.
I smell.
I havent' even brushed my teeth.
We've been awake for almost 9 hours and I am still in my pajamas, and it is not because I want to be!
I peek in to see just how mad she is and it's apparent that this is going to be very difficult.
I peer over the side of her bed and...
I get the biggest, most beautiful smile.
It's contagious.
I am then smiling from ear to ear, despite my frustration.

She is stubborn.
She is beautiful.
She is mine.

Most days are not like that.
Most days we wake and eat and play.

Most days are incredibly happy and fun.

She is such a happy baby.
I am a happy mama.

Would I trade the frustrating days for a day without her?
Not a chance.

Time for quiet

There's something about the quiet that beckons me to sit and sip on hot tea, despite the mess of a house surrounding me.
Maybe it's because the quiet moments are so few and far between that I am in desperate need of time to sit with only my thoughts to keep me company.
That's something about having your first baby, that no matter how many times you've been told, you can not understand until it's upon you.
I don't miss the long hot showers or the uninterrupted sleep.
I don't miss the ability to stay out late or watch a movie in a theater.
I don't miss the time freedom or relaxing evenings.
I don't even really miss the hours of alone time with my husband.
I have adjusted to our new life.
We are a family of 3 now.
We make it work, and it works well.
Todd and I find time.
We still go out, even if it's a little more difficult.
What I miss is time for myself.
Only me and my thoughts.
I didn't realize how important they were to my well being until recently.
Up until lately, I have been filling the quite in the house with chores that were undone and fun projects that I wanted to do.
I filled the quiet with a shower and hair and make-up.
Dinner.
TV.
A book.
I have always filled the quiet.
I believe this has hurt me.
My patience is shorter.
My compassion and grace less.
I believe this is because I have filled the quiet moments.

One a day.
I will take one quite moment a day to just sit and be.
An experiment.
I believe this will be good for me.
Good for my family.

They need me at my best and that is what I desire to give to them.
One a day.

2011 in a nutshell.

Well the first month of the new year is coming to a close.
Life has finally slowed down for a moment and allowed me to reflect over the past year and prepare for the one to come.

2011 was the most eventful year of my life.

I've had many other eventful years, but none of them hold a candle to 2011.

Todd got a new job at New Beginnings Baptist Church.

This was a huge blessing for us.
Previously, Todd had worked for his dad's wrecker company doing service calls and managing the few service drivers.
This was good for us for the phase we were in.

Just a married couple. Living in a claustrophobic house in town.
My daycare closed due to the move.

Trying to figure out the next step.
We were making a really good living and I was able to spend all day with Todd as he worked. This allowed for him to work 10-14 hours a day, 6 days a week.
Then we found out we were going to have a baby.

This surely wasn't going to work.
No benefits. Long hours. Family business stress. I certainly couldn't tote a baby around with us.
I started to panic.
I cried.
A LOT.
What were we going to do?
Then, just like always, God provided a new way.
New Beginnings was part time contract work in the beginning, but we were all hoping and praying that it would become permanent and full time in the church's new budget year in April.
God delivered.
April 1, 2011
A weight so heavy was lifted off of our shoulders.
Meanwhile, we had purchased a foreclosed house in Sand Springs.
January 3, 2011
For the first 4 months that we owned the house, it just loomed over our heads like a dark storm cloud.
I was deathly ill with the gift of life growing inside of me and Todd was unbelievably busy working for TowBoys AND New Beginnings AND keeping up with his website business.
This was another reason working full time at New Beginnings was such a blessing.
Todd finally had time to work on the house and it was a good thing, because if you didn't already catch it...
I was pregnant!

We had a baby due in August and were living in a two bedroom, 500 sq ft house.
Todd has a baby grand piano.
We were having a baby.
The two babies were going to be sharing a room.
Not completely ideal.
The house needed to get done.

We hadn't decided yet if we were going to rent it out and move closer to Bixby, or if we were going to live in it ourselves.

On rolled the remodel and the pregnancy.

In case you don't recall, the summer of 2011 was THE HOTTEST summer of my entire life.

What a time to be pregnant and due in August. :-)

It was finally baby time.

 

Only 5 days late... in the hottest summer of my life.

This was not only the 2nd big event of 2011, it was also the biggest, most glorious, most precious, most wonderful event of our lives.

August 7, 2011.

We are now parents.

We have the most beautiful baby girl.

We finally knew what everyone was talking about.

 

This is when I really put the pressure on Todd to GET THE HOUSE FINISHED!

I never yell. ;-)
The days became VERY long for the both of us.

Life with a newborn is tiring enough, but adding the house on top of it was just exhausting.

The long days and sleep deprived nights soon paid off.
The house was ready to move into in November.
November 14, 2011
Whew. What a year.

It was such a busy year, that the busyness even bled over into January of 2012. :-)
Life is finally slowing down.
We are getting into a routine.
Todd has settled at New Beginnings.

Afton is almost 6 months old!

The house is unpacked and almost all decorated.

(project preview)

New job.

New baby.

New house.

Those are all on the top 5 list of 'big life events'.

Does it get any better than this?